Even amidst the wildly flashing lights of the rave, and the pounding music in my chest…I couldn’t help but to focus all of my attention on ‘him’. Not even the thick orgy of perspiring bodies on the dance floor could do much to block him from my continuous stare. He’s soooo beautiful to me. The most fascinating part of any scene he steps into.
From the moment I walked into the club that night, I started to look for him. He comes in all the time. And because of that…*I* come in all the time. Maybe I’m crazy, who knows? But I can’t help myself. He truly amazes me…in more ways than I could ever hope to count. God…I want him soooo BAD!!! Sometimes it literally HURTS to be so close to him and not have him be mine. I’ve actually come close to shedding TEARS over my infatuation for this boy, and my lack of courage to do anything about it. How crazy is that? He can just be the sweetest, most exciting, most genuine person that I’ve ever met sometimes. His smile drives me wild. I don’t think I’ve ever been so psycho over anyone like this before. And no matter how much the desire builds up in my chest and urges me to go forward to get to know him even better…I still chicken out, nine times out of ten. And probably will again tonight. He’s the friendliest boy in the world, but making the first move to say hello to him is just…not my thing. Sighhh…I’m so lost right now.
I used to feel really out of place in these clubs. I just turned 16 about a month ago, so it’s not like I was expected to have a huge amount of experience when it came to the club and rave scene. But just over a year ago, I met a boy over by Buckingham Fountain one night that quite literally changed my life forever. He talked to me like no one else ever had before. Like…he knew things about me. Private things. He understood the world on such a profoundly deep level of wisdom and experience that even my teachers and parents couldn’t reach me on once he had become a constant part of my life. It was hard to believe that he was my age. Heh…then I came to find out that he wasn’tmy age. Nowhere near it, actually. I suppose he was gonna have to come clean eventually, but I can’t say that I was prepared for it when it happened. It took a bit of an ‘adjustment’, to say the least. But in the end, our relationship remained the same. We’ve been inseparable ever since.
I can’t imagine that it was easy for him to tell me about the whole ‘vampire’ thing at first. I guess it would be like me trying to come out of the closet to my parents. It’s a hard concept to grasp. But ever since then, I’ve been exposed to a whole civilized underworld that I never even knew existed in this city. If people had any idea how many of these things there were just around the dark corners and alleys of the cities…they’d be terrified. I get a little uneasy myself from time to time.
My best vampire friend’s name is Jason, and he’s the one who keeps bringing me back to these hidden halflife clubs on the weekends. He’s teaching me everything he knows. He even went so far as to buy me a safeguard mark to keep me from getting….um…eaten alive, I suppose. Which is a good thing. It was difficult to explain to my parents why I had a permanent tattoo on the side of my neck, but I was able to dance around the issue until they racked it up as a teen angst thing and let it go. Lucky. Now if only I can keep themaway from going out at night, I’d be able to sleep better at night.
Jason’s sire, as they call it, has a ton of money to burn. So he’s basically a ‘houseboy’ for him. All Jason has to do is party all night, spend money, have a good time, and then go home for a long night of passionate love making. That’s all his sire wants for him and from him. And they make the cutestcouple, they really do. I feel really lucky to have been let in on the secret. To live like they do. To connect. Interact. Absorb. Such an unreal existence…a life in darkness.
Don’t misunderstand me. I’m still very much a human being. Just your average high school teenager. I asked Jason to bite me once, and he told me that I wasn’t ready. Whatever that means. He told me that crossing over for the wrong reasons would be a mistake that I would regret for the rest of eternity. That it was basically a suicide that I managed to live through. I’ll have to admit, at first I took offense at him refusing to make me one of them. But now that I look back on the first few times that I asked him…I realize that he was right. It’s not a decision you can really take lightly. Not something that just looks cool where you can jump in blindly and start having fun. Thankfully, Jason was responsible enough to know that. Besides, why give up the daylight forever when I can enjoy the best parts of the vampire lifestyle without making the sacrifice? Despite a little teasing about me being human on occasion, Jason is always overjoyed to have me join him at vampire parties and stuff. I’m almost like his ‘pet’ when he goes to these events. Hehehe! They can always sniff me out and tell I’m not one of them at first glance. But they don’t seem to mind. If anything, it’s almost like a status symbol…still being alive and all. A real life teenager. Not forever stuck in adolescence the way they were. The other vampires seemed to really embrace me for that. There were a few jerks here and there that I think were just jealous of me having a pulse, but…for the most part I became a regular well known party boy too, right at Jason’s side. Every weekend evening that I could successfully sneak out of the house and sneak back in later, that is. This whole thing has been a really WILD ride. Going to clubs at my age is like…wow! I mean, I get to party with freaking vampiresuntil dawn! How cool is THAT?
“MARK! What are you DOING, man! Snap out of it!” Jason shouted over the music as he caught me staring at my dream boy again from across the room. “You seriously need to just ask him if he’s interested or not so you can get it over with! What are you waitingfor? Honestly?”
“I know, it’s just…it’s not that easy, ok? I’m working up to it.” I said.
“Working up to it? Right.” He grinned. “Well, just remember…he’s got a LOT more time to wait than you do. You’re not gonna look so cute trying to get a 13 year old to go home with you when you’re forty, dude.”
“Very funny. You’re a riot.” I rolled my eyes, but after a shared smile…my stare wandered right back over to the beauty at the bar. “He’s just so….soooo…”
“Ugh! You’re hopeless.” Jason reached forward to fix my medium length blond hair, still stiff with gel and glitter. And he reached down to the holes in my jeans to rip them open just a little bit wider. I wiggled a bit, and he told me, “Stop fidgeting! I’ve gotta get you looking your hottest.”
“Because you’re going to talk to him tonight. That’s why.”
“I’m WHAT???” I backed away from him, but Jason just followed me, still trying to pretty me up. “What are you TALKING about? No!” I said, but Jason just smiled at me.
“Here, take some of my glow bands. Put these on your wrists. He loves these things. Keep ’em. I’ve got plenty.”
“Jason…you’re not hearingme! I said NO!”
“What’s the big deal?”
“I’m not comfortable with any of this.”
“And yet you come here night after night, week after week, and you STAREat him from the darkest corner of the room that you can find. Does that make sense? You’re supposed to be having fun, aren’t you?” Jason waited for an answer, but all I could really give him was a whimper.
“I…I wantto, but…”
“If you want it, then go for it. Anybody that has the ability to make you ACHE this way has gotta be worth taking a shot in the dark.” He said. “Besides…maybe you’ll get lucky and he’ll give you a few shots in your mouth! Hehehe! All over those pretty little pouty lips of yours!”
Omigod! What an image! “JESUS, Jason! Don’t DO that! That doesn’t help to calm me down, you know?!?!”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah…whatever. Look, you’re gonna talk to him, and you’re gonna feel good about it. You hear me? I know you’re worried. You’ve said it a million times before. But that’s gonna stop. Why don’t you try pushing things to the next level this time? What’s the harm in taking a little chance?”
“I TRIED that, Jason! Really, I did. But…I don’t know. Every time I try to talk to him, I end up just being this really nervous wreck, and I try to combat that awful feeling in my gut by being ‘friendly’. And he always responds, because he’s just….awesome like that, and that’s what he does. But I can’t GO any further than that! I mean…we get stuck in this totally un-romantic, ‘friendly’, conversation where I couldn’t make a move on him even if I WANTED to…and the whole time I’m trying not to be creepy and weird, and he’s smiling at me and being all cute and….UGH!!! Jason HELPme!!!” I whined, and he laughed at me.
“Ok, look…I’m going to bring him over here to talk to you…and then I’ll just fade back into the party and leave you two alone…”
“NO!!!Don’t do that!”
“Do you want to walk over thereinstead?”
“NO!!!I don’t want to do THAT either!” I said, my breathing getting shallow with a sense of near panic.
Jason gave me a teasing look. “Okaaaaaay…so what are we doing here tonight? How are we gonna pull this off? Figure something out, because this is happening whether you want it to or not.” I nearly squirmed right out of my own shirt, the discomfort causing my heart to beat loud enough to almost drown out the hard techno beat of the music in my ears. Jason persisted, “Hehehe, do you wanna just toss him a cell phone from the other side of the club, call him up, and talk to him THAT way?” I nearly slugged him for that suggestion. “Hahaha! WHAT??? There’s an awful amount of distance between you and your favorite boy! You’ve gotta cross it SOMEHOW!”
“I…I KNOW….I just don’t wanna come off as being…”
“Human?” He smirked, taking the slug in the arm for real this time.
“Omigod…now that I think about it, is he gonna really trip on the whole human thing? Maybe he only dates other vampires.”
Jason grinned. “Why don’t we concentrate on whether or not he’s even gay first, huh? Hehehe, we can worry about the human aspect later. It’s a lot easier to make that leap.” He said. “I mean, look at him. He’s waytoo cute to be straight. He’s always in clubs like this with boys like you and me and he’s got multi-colored hair. He’s got to at LEAST be bisexual. And hey, if not…you never know, Mark! If you make a good enough impression on him, maybe he’ll cross you over like you wanted!”
I gasped! Omigod…that would be so HOT! SOOOO freaking *HOT*!!!!
“Ok. I’ll…I don’t know…I’ll think of something to say to him. Just give me a few minutes.” I said. “Do you really think he’ll…like…talk to me?”
“C’mon, dude! He ALWAYS talks to you! He LIKES you! He LOVES to party. He has for as long as I’ve known him, and that’s a pretty long time. He always has a smile on his face, he’s always the most popular halflife in the room, EVERYBODY loves him…and yet, he’s always super happy to talk to YOU. What does THAT tell you?”
I glanced back over at him again…standing by the bar, getting another free drink from the bartenders that absolutely adored him almost as much as I did…the mixed colors of his dyed hair being lit up by the frenzied lights overhead. Just seeing his sweet smile made me weak in the knees. Just one kiss. I’d give up EVERYTHING I own for just *ONE* kiss of those sweet candied lips.
“I dunno. Maybe tonight’s not the right night…” I mumbled, but Jason knew how to focus his hearing on me to pick up every sound.
“Tonight IS the right night. EVERY night is the right night! Win or lose, you’re going to take a chancetonight. I don’t wanna hear about it anymore.” Then Jason added, “Go! If you don’t go over there, I’m just gonna walk over there and tell him to read your thoughts to see what you’re thinking. I don’t think you want that!” Omigod, I hope he was fucking joking about that!!!
“Sighhh…fine! Ok! Alright, just…quit PUSHING so hard.”
Jason winked at me and said, “I’ll leave the ‘hard pushing’ to you once you get lodged in tight little cute ass of his! Hehehe!” With another gasp, I gave him another slug in the shoulder. “Oww! Watch it! You know you want him. I would have gone for him myself if I didn’t have a good thing going already.” He saw me practically shaking, and he put his hands on my shoulders to hold me still. “Mark…don’t worry. You’re hot, you’re smart, and you guys have already had a few chances to talk to each other. You knowhe’ll be happy to see you. Just relax and be yourself. K?”
I nodded, trying to calm the quake in my stomach. “Yeah. Ok.”
“Breathe. Hehehe, you’ll be fine.” Jason gave me a hard pat on my shoulders, then grabbed the sides of my face to bring me forward and give me a quick, hard, kiss on the forehead. “Now go find a way to wrap your lips around some sexy vampire boy dick before the sun comes up!”
Jason’s REALLY gotta stop putting those images in my head if he wants to make this any easier!
Ok. Alright. Shit…just walk over. How hard could it be? He says hello to me whenever he sees me, right? So…I’ve just gotta let him see me. Get close enough, and hopefully the rest of the club boys and girls will stop clawing at him long enough to give us a few minutes to talk. And then…
Fuck it. I’ll just wing it.
I moved through the dark room, spinning lights flailing back and forth across my face. My beating heart was causing me to tremble with every step, but I kept moving. If nothing else, I was going to at least take a chance. I can do this. Omigod, he’s soooo cute. I love that boy’s smile. And he’s alwayssmiling. I wonder what his kiss would be like. I imagine that it would be mind-blowing.
I moved closer, and once I was about ten to fifteen feet away from him, I tried to look casual as I leaned against the bar. I don’t think there’s anything more uncomfortable than tryingto look comfortable. I turned around and put my elbows on the bar behind me, pretending to look out at the dance floor while taking little peeks at him to see if he noticed me yet. C’mon…please notice me. I don’t know how to get any more brave than I am right now.
Finally, while distracted by my own worries, I heard his sweet voice say my name. “Mark! Dude, what’s up? Long time, no see!”
“Oh, h-hey…” I said, attempting to look surprised.
“Hey, kid…this tab of yours is running kinda long, don’t you think?” The bartender asked him.
“Come on now, Paulie, you know I’m good for it. Have I ever let you down before?”
“If I had to make a list of all the times you did, it would be longer than your tab.”
He gave the man a charming grin, and said, “Just keep it open for tonight. I’ll find somebody to pay it for me. You know I will.” Then he added, “Get my friend, Mark, something too. Something ‘human’. Hehehe!”
I’ve heard Jason use that expression before. It usually meant the kind of drink with a small dose of alcohol that wouldn’t knock your average teenager on his ass and have him spilling his dinner all over the dance floor. The man slid me a glass of some sweet tasting drink, similar to lemonade.
“I MEAN it, Gyro! Pay your tab!” The man said.
“Don’t worryso much! If you weren’t crossed over, you’d be worrying yourself grey!” Then, the prettiest boy in the club…he took a hold of my hand to lead me away from the bar. “Come on, let’s get out of here before he draws a stake on me. Hehehehe!”
Sighhhh….Gyro. I wish I could explain my intense infatuation without getting goofy and swooning to the point where I lost balance. Physically, I know that he was a bit younger than me, but the truth was he had to be older by quite a few years. I’ve never been sure how many exactly, but I imagine it must be four or five at least. I think I was just attracted to the ‘life’ in him. It poured out of him in abundance. He felt so good about himself and about life in general that it made youfeel good just being in his presence. He had an aura about him that was just sooooo attractive. I fell hard for boys like that. Can’t help it really.
“So you found a way to sneak out tonight, huh?” He asked me as we pushed our way to one of the booths in the corner.
“Yeah. Um…well….sorta. I’ll probably get caught. I’m running out of excuses for coming home as late as I do.”
“Hehehe, dawn isn’t late. Technically, it’s early.” He grinned. Blazing white teeth. Such beautiful shiny brown eyes. “So what’s new with you? It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve seen you around.”
“I’ve been here. I always show up. You’re the one who’s hard to keep up with all of a sudden.” I said. Is it weird that I’m shaking just from the knowledge that I’m talking to him? That he’s talking to me? That we’re talking to each other?
“Oh, well, you know me. Gotta keep the party moving. Besides, there’s been a lot of drama back at the lot lately.”
“The lot? That’s…where you live, right? Or where you’re staying?”
“Yes. And yes. I don’t know…this time I’m thinking of making it a real home this time. You know, maybe stay for good.” He said, then leaned forward, his cute little face getting closer to mine. “Dude, I can’t really say anything, but I have seen some kick ass shit over the last few months! I’m talking, like…of Biblicalproportions! That’s one party that I don’t wanna miss!”
“Yep! I’m buddies with Superman!” He said, taking another sip of his drink. “Don’t tell anybody I said that though. That’s just a secret for you and me.” Wow….a secret for the two of us. There goes that jittery feeling in my stomach. I was thankful for the darkness surrounding us in the club, because I was sure that I was turning seven shades of red at that moment.
I saw a lady vampire step up to the table, about 18 years old. She would have been pretty, were it not for the angry scowl on her face. “Well, look who bothered to peek his head out of the foxhole for a change.”
Gyro cringed a bit, but covered it up with a smile. “Felicia…hehehe, hi! Hey…”
“You hanging out with ‘daylights’ now?” She said, referring to me evidently.
“This is my friend Mark! Mark, this is Fel….”
“Don’t try to charm your way out of this one, Gyro! What happened to calling me back? What happened to coming to visit and taking me on a road trip? Where were you?”
Gyro shrugged his shoulders at first, but that didn’t seem to make her any happier. He said, “Come on, Felicia…it hasn’t been that long. I was gonna call you. It’s been…what? A couple months?”
“It was July…of 2001…” She snarled with narrowed eyes.
Gyro grinned sheepishly. “Heh…yeah…well, September 11th changed a lot of things for all of us…”
“What the helldoes 9/11 have to do with…???”
“You know what? Hold that thought! Me and Mark have to run to the bar and pay our tab before Paulie has a heart attack!” I felt a light kick under the table, and Gyro and I scooted our way out of the booth as fast as we could. “We’ll be right back! Promise!”
“GYRO!!! Don’t you dash out on me, Gyro!”
“I’ll call you!!!” He said with a giggle, and he took me by the hand, pulling me through the thickest parts of the partying crowd so she couldn’t follow. The both of us were laughing like crazy, and if he hadn’t been holding on to me, I’m certain that we would have lost each other. Gyro had me duck my head down, and we stayed hidden somewhere between his angry stalker chick and his unpaid bar tab. “Hey, why don’t you and me get out of here? I could use a little air.”
“Hehehe, yeah, I noticed.” I said. He gave me the sweetest smile. And I swear, for a moment…just a moment…the whole world went silent. It was…a beauty that took me by surprise. It was like falling in love for the first time. If our eye contact had lasted for a second longer, I think I would have fainted.
“Come on, I know the security guy near the back. He’ll let us go out that way.” He said, and we started zig zagging our way to the back of the club. We moved with our heads down, but trying to ‘sneak’ anywhere with Gyro was an exercise in futility.
Everyone that we passed grinned at us, as they knew that Gyro was making another one of his patented escapes.
“There he goes! See ya Gyro!”
“Run, baby! Run! Hahahaha!”
The whole crowd began to cheer as we raced to the back door, with only a few angry curses being shouted in our direction. Knowing the routine, the large security guard with the dark glasses just shook his head and stepped aside, holding the door open for us as we rushed out into the cool night air. Gyro might have made many an escape from this club and many more like it, but this was my first. You couldn’t imagine the exhilarating feeling I experienced, just having my favorite boy take me with him. My head was swimming with infatuation, even as he practically dragged me for about three blocks before remembering that my fragile body didn’t quite have the same stamina that his did.
We stopped in a small park area to rest, and I had to put my hands on my knees just to catch my breath. Gyro giggled in the cutest way ever when he saw me so exhausted. Hehehe! As hard as it was to get my breathing back to normal on my own, I couldn’t help but to giggle with him. If I thought that I could raise an arm to give him a playful shove without falling over, I would have. Instead, Gyro took advantage of my weakened state, with a finger, he pushed me over onto my side, and laughed as he sat down in the grass beside me. “You definitely need some more exercise dude. That was like…sucha short run.”
Still wheezing a bit, I said, “Are you kiddingme? Running with you is like being dragged behind a rocket powered racecar.” I said, and he giggled again.
“Aw, quit your belly aching. Hehehe, better that you be stuck out here with me than back at the club trying to settle my debts. Trust me on this.”
Taking a bit of a risk, I smiled at him warmly, and I said, “Well…I can’t argue with that. Being out here with you is…pretty much better than most anything I can think of.”
He smiled at me. “Well, aren’t yousweet. Hehehe!”
He laid back on the grass with me, and we both looked up at the stars above for a while. I wish that I could stop trembling like this in his presence, but he was soooo nice to me. So amazing. He talked to me with such ease. It’s like…Gyro never gets nervous about much of anything. God, I’d give anything to be more like him. Anything.
Every word that came out of his mouth fascinated me to no end. His smile was the most addictive thing in the world. And when I spoke, he listened to me. I mean…REALLY listened. I go to school during the week, and I’m surrounded by people who just…treat me like I’m their therapist. They’re basically just talking to themselves and forcing me to sit still and listen so they don’t feel weird about it. Not Gyro, though. He genuinely responds to everything I say. And not in a selfish way, either. He ‘hears’ me. And he always wants to hear more. He’s not just manipulating me into listening to him, he’s…like…interested in me. Wow. It made me feel so special.
At one point, we were just lazily talking about life as a whole….and you know what he says to me? He says, “I wish people spent less energy putting up walls and more energy trying to see what’s behind them.” Is that not the cutest thing ever???
I’m like, “What do you mean?”
And he says, “Well…it’s like people are always talking about what they hate, and what they don’t like, and what ticks them off…it’s so sad, you know? They work extra hard, trying to find fault with everything so they’ll have a reason to reject it. Like…they’re too proud to admit that they enjoyed something. I don’t want to put up any limitations as to what I might find out there in the world. The people I associate with, the music I listen to, the places I travel to. the movies I see, the club scenes I’ve been a part of…I wanna see it all, you know? I mean, why limit your interests by pretending to hate everything? You never know what you might find if you stop boxing yourself in. I guess it’s just silly to me.”
“Yeah, I guess.” I sighed dreamily. I was trying to pull my eyes away from the very beauty of him, but I was falling even deeper in love with him than I was before. No matter what, it just kept getting worse. He’s so….arrrgh! “More people should think like you do, Gyro.” I said, kissing up to him as much as possible.
“Heh…well, maybe, maybe not. I wouldn’t claim to be the best role model out there for anybody to follow.” He grinned. “Besides, I wasn’t always like this, you know? I used to be…quite the little geek back when I was…well…almostyour age. Hehehe!”
I snickered. “C’mon, get outta here. You? I don’t buy that for a minute.”
“Dead serious. It’s true. I was like, this quiet little bookworm before I crossed over. Like…NO friends, really. Lonely. Bashful. Didn’t go out at all. I don’t know how I was able to even survive like that for as long as I did.”
“Hehehe, well what happened?”
He smirked at the memory. “I just woke up one morning and decided to change. That was that.”
I gave him a sideways look. “There HAD to be more to it than that.”
“No. Not really. Deciding to stop being a geek and actually get out of the house to LIVE a little was the hard part. Once I did that, everything else was easy. I stopped making excuses…and it was like friends and good times and parties just sorta fell out of the sky. I guess it was always right there in front of me, but I couldn’t see it. I was too scared.” He said. “It’s like…I really WANTED to have friends and people to talk to. But…the problem was, I didn’t have anything to SAY to them. Like…even if I went out of my way to get their attention and said hello…what the heck could I possibly talk to them about? I didn’t do anything with my life. I didn’t share any common interests with anyone because I didn’t ever explore anything. I was so far out of the loop that I couldn’t even relate to anybody. The most I could do was get their focus for a few minutes and then borethem to death with my awkward conversation about stuff that doesn’t relate to anybody at all. What was I gonna do? Talk about the weather? ‘Wow’ them with my knowledge of the state capitals? Who would want to be around me when I was so clueless about what to say to another human being. Hehehe! It’s weird, but you’ve gotta live a little to find out how to live a little more.”
Sighhh….he’s a gorgeous soul. He really is. “That’s…awesome. I guess I never thought of it like that.” I said. I really wanted to kiss him at that moment. I wanted to pull him on top of me and feel him grind into me as our tongues mingled and I squeezed the adorable cheeks of his sweet ripe ass. I was almost breathlesswith the craving. He was soooo close. “I wish I could be one of you…”
“One of…?” He said, confused. Then he caught on. “Oh…hehehe, nah. No, you don’t. It’s overrated. You’d be surprised how many vampires wish they could go back to being ‘one of you‘ instead.”
“Really? I’d think it would be amazing. I’m sure that…um…the ‘killing’ part is ummm…unpleasant. I mean, I’m sure that sucks…” I said.
He grinned. “Hehehe, ‘sucks’. Yeah, it does.”
“But STILL! I mean, you get to sleep all day, and party all night. You can come and go as you please…and you get to be young forever. How can that be anything less than a life of eternal bliss?”
“Believe me, Mark…it’s not all it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes it’s fun, but…I’d be lying if I said I didn’t miss my mom and dad sometimes. Or just…daylight, you know? Some nights…the clubs and the music and the people calling my name…it’s not enough. Sometimes I need something more.” He said, a melancholy tone creeping into his hazy young voice. God…I felt myself moving closer to him on the ground. I was getting so hard, being this close to him. Hearing him talk. I wanted him so bad that I could tasteit. Then he said, “Besides…my friend, Bryson, says that the most beautiful thing about youth is that it’s fleeting. That’s what makes it so precious. So fragile. I guess he’s kinda right. I almost wish that I could get all old and fat, and then look back at a yearbook photo of myself, looking the way I do now.”
“Hell, yeah. I think that’d be awesome!” He giggled, changing his voice to sound like an old man while feebly shaking his fist, “Like…’I was such a fine young man back in the day. Look at me. I was a total lady-killer babe magnet. Now hand me my pills, it’s time for ‘Murder She Wrote’…”
“Time for what?” I asked, and he gave me a smirk.
“Nevermind. Hehehe, it’s before your time. But that’s what I would have said though. Yep!” He was so cute. Thoughts of him naked danced through my mind. Fantasies of his smooth thighs closing in on my ears as I sucked him deeply into my mouth…tasting every succulent inch of him. Licking him from head to toe. Rocking each other’s worlds until we fell asleep from the exhaustion…only to wake up next to my boyish prince again a little bit later. Whimpering until I got some more naked loving from him. Oh God…the things I would do to make this boy holler my name….
“I still think…it would be cool…” I said softly, moving closer, inch by inch. “…Just being with you. Even in all this darkness. With the right person…I think I could take it.”
I thought about laying on top of his back, feeling those sweet little globes under me, inviting me inside. I just know that Gyro would be the kind of boy that would make the sexiest noises ever when you’re making love to him. His body would be soooo tight. I wish I could taste his tongue right now. He’s driving me nuts just sitting there, smiling like that.
“Heh, I’m telling you, dude….all of the allure surrounding this lifestyle, it’s all from the outside.” He said, not seeing me raise up on one elbow to hover over him slightly.
“Not all of it…” I whispered. I couldn’t help myself. My emotions had been pulled and stretched and tortured to the point where…if I didn’t kiss him right away, I was going to shrivel up into a ball and roll away like a giant tumbleweed. I HAD to do this! I HADto!!! I felt like I couldn’t breathe, and my heart was about to leap up into my throat and try to escape on its own if it beat any harder. But despite it all, I just….I WENT for it! I didn’t want this opportunity to pass and at least not take a chance. Like Gyro said…you’ve got to LIVE a little to find out how to live a little more…
I leaned down quickly. I don’t think he was looking at that particular moment. And just as he opened his mouth to say something else, I connected my lips to his, and kissed him deeply, pushing my tongue inside and getting a taste of him as a symphony of infatuated fireworks went off in my head.
Apparently….they were ONLY in my head…
“Mmmph! Whoah….whoah whoah…Mark, umm….wait…” Gyro said, lightly pushing me away. The look on his face was…NOT what I was expecting. “Dude…I uh…I…..wow…”
“Oh no….oh shit…” I said. It felt like my heart was being squeezed in a giant vice. Tightening up more and more until it was almost ready to pop. this was dumb! So dumb! I made a mistake! A STUPID fucking mistake! Oh no! OH NO!!!!
“No…it’s cool, Mark. It is. I just…I mean…I’m not…” He was struggling for a polite way to totally rejectme. But a rejection is a rejection…no matter how much you sugarcoat it.
“No, I get it.” I said abruptly.
“It’s not that I’m not…um…flattered…”
“Flattered. Heh…right. Yeah. Sure.”
“No! It’s cool Everything’s cool. I think…I think I should go….it’s late. I need to get home.” My heart was breaking. It hurt sooooo much. My only mission now was to get away from Gyro before he could see me crying.
“You don’t have to leave. You just caught me off guard, dude…”
“Yeah, I know. Off guard. Gotta go…”
“REALLY…don’t leave, ok?” He said. “I’m not upset. Really. I’ve got a lotof gay friends back at the lot. It’s no big deal.”
Trying to hold back the emotion, I looked at him and I said, “I’m sorry, Gyro….but to me…this wasa big deal.” Ugh! Why did I say that??? WHY? What was my plan? To ‘guilt trip’ him into being gay? That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever done! All I did was make him feel bad. The LAST thing I wanted to do was make him feel bad!
Disgusted with myself, I hopped up from the ground and just….ran. It was the only thing that I could think to do. I ran top speed, hoping to get as far away from Gyro as humanly possible. My legs strained with every big step I took, my sneakers pulling the concrete beneath me to move me forward. But…before I could leave the park…I saw Gyro step out from behind a tree in front of me, and hold his hand out to stop me.
I was so tired from running that the extra shock of seeing him there took what little breath I had left in me. I slid on the ground and fell back on my butt, looking up at Gyro as he stood over me.
“Huff…huff…how….huff…how did you…?”
“Dude…you’re human. Did you really think that you’d be able to outrun me?” He said, and then gave me a smirk as he offered me a hand to get up. “Mark…I toldyou….it’s ok. Ok? I’m not freaking out or anything…”
“I’m sorry. Gyro, I just…I likeyou, ok? I like you a lot, and you were talking, and I thought…I thought that maybe…” An intense feeling of shame washed over me, and I just wanted to get out of that park so I wouldn’t have to humiliate myself any further over this.
But it was then that I felt Gyro’s hand on my shoulder. “It’s alright. Hehehe, I’ve had boys fall in love with me before. I’m just awesome like that.”
I peeked up at his sparkling eyes, and that adorable ‘joking’ smile of his just made me want him even more. Why can’t I stop? God this hurts. I suddenly felt like such a perverted loser for ogling him like I have been for the last…God, who knows HOW long? This is the worst thing I’ve ever done. I wanted to curl up into a little ball and just disappear completely. But when he saw my eyes watering up with embarrassment, Gyro just opened his arms and he pulled me in for a loving hug around the middle. I faked a giggle and said, “Stop being cute, ok? I just…God…I’m SO mortifiedright now!”
“Well, don’t be. Please?” He said. I just…I didn’t know that you felt that way. I actually feel like I kinda led you on, now.”
I said, “You led me on just by being you, Gyro. I know it doesn’t matter now, but…you’re really beautiful, you know that? Seriously.” I saw him blush a little, and I hid my face from him, and I said, “See? You’re getting cuter by the minute. I don’t think you can help it.” A tear ran down my cheek. I didn’t want him to feel bad or anything but…the hurt of it all just wouldn’t let me keep my composure. Not for a second. He moved to give me another hug, but I stepped back from him this time. “Don’t. Ok? You don’t owe me that. I just…I think I should go home. I know that it’s all cool with you and stuff, but I just…I don’t wanna…”
“Come on. I wanna show you something.” He said with a mischievous smirk.
“What?” I sniffled. “But…but I just said that I’d rather…”
“Yeah, I heard what you said. Put a hold on that for now. C’mon! I wanna show you. You’ll like it. Promise. Hehehe…” How is it that he’s so giggly when he was just kissed by another boy? How can he suddenly be so cheerful that it actually made ME start to feel better?
“Gyro…I don’t know…”
“You don’t have to know anything. Just come with me. Come on.” He said, and he yanked on my shirt a little bit. “I’m a lot stronger than you are, you know? Hehehe! I could force you if I wanted to.” I snickered at the idea, but he only snickered back. “I’m serious! I could hoist you over my shoulder like they do in those old school monster movies if I wanted to. But it would look crazyweird to your average person on the street. So just follow me. Please? It’ll be really cool. Promise.”
Sigh…like I could say no to him if I wanted to. Even now. I sighed, “Fine. Where are we going?”
He said, “This way.” And started walking.
I’m like, “But…I asked where we were going.”
“And I said, we’re going ‘this way’. So if you keep going in this direction, eventually you’ll get there. Hehehe!”
He said, “Unh unh, too late. I know that you’re madly in love with me now. So it’s too late for insults, buddy.” Ugh! Low blow. But a cute one.
I won’t lie…it took the entire walk for my tears to dry up, even with Gyro being his usual charming self. But even when the ears and the sniffles had gotten themselves under control…the hole in my heart remained empty. There’s just something about feeling deep in your BONES that this one boy would be the absolute perfectmatch for you…that fate had somehow made this all possible because it was just meant to be…only to find out that it was all a stupid hoax. Something about that was like having the floor pulled out from under you and falling into a pit of hungry crocodiles. Still, I sucked it up and tried my best to be engaging. Even if my strongest instincts just wanted to go home. I felt really ‘exposed’ at that moment. Spending more time with my dream boy only made it worse.
God, I wish he had rejected me with some kind of harsh homophobic slur or something. Ugh! He’s being so cool about this that I can’t even find it in me to HATE him!
We walked and walked, and then he led me to some abandoned apartment building with boarded up windows and weeds growing around the base of it. I sorta hesitated. It looked…dirty. Like…the kind of place a boy vampire would take somebody to KILL them. Don’t know why that crossed my mind, but Gyro’s smile, along with a gentle tug on my wrist, got me to follow him inside.
“What is this place?” I asked, the dust making it hard to breathe.
“It’s a place where I come to think sometimes. Come on, we’ve gotta go to the roof?”
The roof? This whole building looked like it was going to collapse any minute. It was the kind of creepy place your mother always warned you to stay away from. But as Gyro bounced that cute little booty of his up the rickety stairs, streams of dust falling to the ground floor with every step, I had no choice but to follow.
The place seemed to get darker and darker the further I went up…and I was thankful to see Gyro open a door at the top of the steps to finally get some fresh air into my lungs again. He beckoned me outside, and I stepped out onto the roof…marvelling at the view. The building wasn’t really that tall, but the city skyline looked absolutely majestic from there. It was like you could see the whole city at once. An involuntary smile spread across my lips as I took it all in, and for a moment…I forgot about heartbreak.
“Whoah….it’s beautiful…” I said, more to myself than to Gyro.
“Yep, I know. It’s peaceful. It’s kind of like…the total opposite of the clubs and parties and all. You get to sit here and look at all this metropolitan glory…but from a distance, you know? You’re away from the chaos of it, but you still kinda feel like a part of it. I like that.” He smiled, and then put his hands on my shoulders to turn me around. “Annnd…if you look over here…” I did as he said, but I didn’t see much. This part of the city didn’t seem as clean and brightly lit as the other side. But Gyro pointed his finger in the right direction, and he said, “Over there? That’s the lot. That’s where I’m staying right now. See it?”
No only did I see it, but I could vaguely make out a few other boys and girls who were moving around inside of it. “That’s where you live?”
“Yep! I know it looks like a regular junkyard to you…but to us, it’s our Garden of Eden. Trust me, it’s awesome once you get used to it.”
“Are those your friends?”
“Yeah, some of them. Others probably went out tonight. I’m sure Jun is doing his slow kung fu thing or whatever it is. And my sister is there somewhere, but she’s probably stabbing herself with a sharp object and bleeding out in some quiet corner somewhere.”
“She’s what?” I asked.
“It’s a long story. Trust me. You don’t wanna know.” He then took me by the hand, and I saw him sitting down on the gravely surface of the rooftop, and then laying back, pulling me down with him. At first, I thought that he wanted me to actually lie on top of him, which gave me an instant rush of infatuated adrenaline. But thinking better of it, I caught on, and he just wanted me to lay down nextto him. I felt a few rocks digging into my back and shoulders, making it a little uncomfortable at first, but as the stars above were displayed with such brilliance…I relaxed soon after laying down. The fact that Gyro was still holding my hand helped.
We lay there for about 20 minutes, softly talking to one another as friends. He was curious about my life, I was curious about his…it was this really soothing exchange. It made me appreciate him even more. Then I said, “Gyro? Can I ask you a question?”
“Fire away.” He said.
“Why me? I mean…a hundred people would have been happy to go home with you tonight. I’m just…I’m so lame. Heh…”
“No you’re NOT. Hehehe, shut up.” He said. “You wanna know how I discovered you the first time?” That definitely got my attention.
“The first time?”
“Yeah. Hehehe!” He turned his head to look at me…his lips were just a foot and a half away from me. I found myself wanting to kiss him all over again. “You were a strobelight puppy. You stood out. So I wanted to say hello.”
I got confused. “Wait…I don’t get it. I was a….a strobelight…?”
“A strobelight puppy. Yeah.” He kinda rolled his eyes in this really cute way, and he looked back up at the stars. “It’s like…with people who go to clubs all the time, especially vampires who have been doing it for decades, they’re used to the lights and the music and the drinking and the dancing. To them, it’s nothing special. And when the music is really cranked up, and the strobelight starts flashing…they just get more involved in it. It doesn’t affect them.” Then he turned back to look at me. “But then…here are these other people…who aren’t so used to the scene. And when the strobelights comes on, it becomes a bit disorienting. Surprising. It’s hard to navigate, hard to focus. If you look at any dance floor when this starts happening, you can tell the folks who aren’t used to it. Because they always shy off to one of the corners and just kinda stand against the wall while they try to get used to the experience. They look so lost…but they’re happyto be lost. It’s like this really cool combination of fear and amazement. When you look at them, they’re probably just standing there looking like a lonely little puppy, just waiting to be adopted from the pound. Hehehe, thus the term…”
“Strobelight puppy. Ok, I got it. Was that supposed to answer my question or what?” I teased, giving him a little push.
“It DOES! Hold on, I’m getting to that.” He grinned. “In darkness…people get jaded. Cynical, you know? They’ve done it all, seen it all, said it all…after a while, they stop really enjoying themselves. They stop looking for something new to excite the senses. I mean…they’re out and about, sure. But they’re just doing the same things over and over and over again. They’re no different than that quiet little shut-in that I used to be. Afraid of going out and seeing what life has to offer them. They’re just stuck in a routine. And when I see someone like you….someone who’s actually experiencing life with his eyes wide open, taking it all in and wanting to be a part of it…well, I think that’s cool, you know? You were the most interesting person in the room.”
I don’t think gyro knew how incredible it made me feel to hear him say that. “You really thought that I was interesting?” I asked.
“Of course. Hehehe, like I said before, people limit themselves. They talk about the same three topics all the time until they’re soooo exhausted that it’s hard to care anymore. God forbid, if they were topics that I didn’t share an interest in in the first place. You looked like you had something newto say. I wanted to hear it.”
“Hehehe, all this because I looked like a lost puppy in the club scene?”
“Awww, that’s not what I meant.” He said. “Strobelight puppies…they have these moments where they feel like they don’t fit in. Like they’re not a part of their environment. But that’s just fear talking. A temporaryfear. Because once they get enough courage to just jump in and have fun…well, they end up being the coolest people ever. You looked like you were ready to jump. I wanted to be there.” He said. “Everybody has situations where they feel they’re not ready, or like they don’t belong…but the truth is, we ALL belong. We just get scared sometimes. If we can beat that…then the world is ours. All of ours.”
The attraction was so strong that I forced myself to turn away from him and look back up at the sky. I know that he was giving me a compliment, but I wish he wouldn’t do that. I’d much rather start turning off my ‘love switches’ now in order to save me from the severe heartbreak to come once I was alone.
He asked me, “What’s wrong?”
“Are you sure? You seem really…sad…”
“I’ll get over it.” I said. “I’m sorry. This is just…hard for me. K? I’m trying, but….but….” I trailed off, and felt tears returning to my eyes. Ugh…the suffering was intense. He was right THERE, and I couldn’t reach out to touch him!
Gyro thought for a second, and another devilish smirk came to his face. “Ok, look…I’m only gonna do this ONE time! Hehehe, and if you tell anybody, I’m totally gonna have you for dinner and bleed you dry! Hehehe, k?”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Here…lift up your shirt a bit.”
WHAT???? Gyro didn’t give me a lot of time to process what was happening. He just ran his soft palm up under my shirt and over the flatness of my stomach. I got the shivers something awful. What was he talking about???? What did he mean? Omigod! Omigod!
“Hehehe, you might wanna undo your pants. It’ll be a mess walking home.” He said, and I gasped as my mind wandered to sexual delights that I was MORE than eager to engage in with my favorite party boy. I didn’t ask any questions, I just unzipped and unbuttoned my pants, my briefs tented out with one of the hardest erections of my life. Gyro giggled in the cutest way. “Take it all the way out. I won’t look. But um…it’s sort of important.” Ok…so now I was confused again. But I did as he said, and I exposed my hardness to the night air.
“Can anybody see us out here?” I whispered.
“Who knows? Hehehe, does it matter?” He replied. And the truth was…to get just a touch from him, no. It didn’t. “Ok…now just…think about me.”
“Think about you?”
“Yeah. All those little fantasies of yours, whatever they may be…bring ’em to the front of your mind, and just relax. I think you’re gonna like this.” Again, I was lost as to what he was saying to me. For all I know, this could be some weird little prank of his or something. But if thinking about him was all I had to do…how hard could that be. Gyro smiled at me. “Ok, now close your eyes.” I did. “Take a deep breath.” I did. “And try not to grab my hair or anything, ok?”
“Try not to wha…???” Before I could finish my sentence, a jolt of energy went right into my chest. It shot right out of his hand, and my body almost lifted itself off the ground with the tension inside. Then…this…this current of tingly sensations spread out to every inch of my body. My erection specifically. They were the most pleasurable, most euphoric, series of tingles that I had ever felt in my entire life. I could barely sit still. What the…what the hell was he doing? My body began to convulse, and my legs flailed a little bit as I tried to find a comfortable position that would allow the energy to just run through me without me wiggling myself right off the edge of the rooftop.
“Are you thinking?” He asked with a giggle. To be honest, I had forgotten about that part. The sudden shock of the sensation had thrown me way off. It was hard to keep my scrambled thoughts from melting like warm butter while under the spell of this arousing ability of his…but I just kept trying.
I thought about kissing his lips. About having him smile down on me as his naked body gyrated against mine. The little tingles had a mind of their own it seemed. They knew exactly how to tickle and tempt me in just the right ways. A smile spread out across my face, but I tried to hide it as I heard Gyro holding back a few bashful snickers from seeing me so turned on. Already, my balls were drawing up tight against me. I could actually feelthe waves of pleasure slowly moving up and down my shaft. I could have SWORN that it was hand doing it. Better yet…a mouth. But when I opened one eye to peek…it was just my stiffy, bouncing around in the air with nothing touching it at all.
Gyro chuckled, “Hey! No cheating. Eyes closed, mister.”
Hearing his voice only made the moment more erotic for me. I began to squirm uncontrollably as the orgasm was quickly reaching its peak. My eyes rolled back, and I pictured Gyro pushing his hips into my face, while I held on to those soft bubbles of flesh…guiding his thrusts. The visions of us tongue kissing like mad, me sucking his balls in between my lips, licking lower…and lower…devouring that candied flesh for all I was worth. And the idea of him facing me, riding my shaft hard while kissing me passionately…it was almost too much to bear. And then…Gyro leaned forward…not in my dreams, but in real life…and he whispered, “I knew you’d dig it. Hehehe!” And his sweet little lips kissed me on the cheek.
It was more than I could handle. My breathing stopped, my body went stiff, and without a single touch, the strong throbs and pulses began to push my juices to the surface. I didn’t know what to hold onto, but as powerful as this climax was, I can see why Gyro warned me not to pull his hair. I probably would have ripped it right out at the root if I had. I gasped for breath, my hands clutching at rocks and gravel as I tightened up even more. Then I stifled a shriek as best as I could as my hand suddenly snapped forward and grabbed one of Gyro’s ass cheeks, squeezing it hard. It was the feeling of that plump little morsel that took me over the edge, and the tingles went wildly as my whole body went into a fury of orgasmic contractions. The first few spurts were like shots out of a canon! I don’t know how high they flew up into the air, but they were already cooled when they landed back down on my chin and neck. And that was just the sneak preview of the torrential storm that was to follow. I clutched at Gyro’s ass with a fever as more and more jets of sticky nectar were released in succession. I couldn’t breathe at all. My body was tossing and turning involuntarily, and my heart was just trying valiantly to keep up. More and more….it was the hardest cum that I had ever had in my life. And Gyro giggled the whole way through it.
When I finally calmed down, and my chest and stomach stopped heaving….I finally opened my eyes all the way, and I fell in love all over again. Honestly…If Gyro asked me to stick my head in a blender and hit the switch, I would have done it without hesitation. He was magic. Everything about my Gyro was magic.
“I told ya it would be a mess. Hehehe!” He said. He pulled his hand out from underneath my shirt, and grinned as he looked for a place to wipe off the semen that had splashed on his arm.
Panting, I said, “Oh man, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”
“Don’t sweat it. If you think girls are any less of a mess, you’d be wrong. Hehehe!” Then he’s like, “You squeezed my ass pretty hard, there, Hercules. Hehehe! Are you ok?”
“Um…yeah. Holy shit…I’m fucking great right now…” I sighed, my eyes instinctively going back to the stars.
“Good. Hehehe, but don’t go thinking this is gonna become a habit. I wouldn’t do this for anybody else.” He said. “Only my strobelight puppy.”
Why is it soooo much cuter when he says it?
I think it was a full forty five minutes before I was able to come down from my orgasmic high. I didn’t want to move. My brain felt like it was tingling. I didn’t know if I’d ever be able to move again…because my muscles remained limp. I think I might have even dozed off a few times. Who knows? But eventually, I felt a tap on my shoulder, and I noticed that the sky was a much lighter shade of blue than it was the last time I had an ‘extended blink’.
“Hey…I’ve gotta go. Daylight’s coming.” Gyro told me. And he helped me back up to my feet. He bushed and pointed down to remind me that my pants were still open and I was hanging out like a clown out of a jack-in-the-box. We both giggled for a moment, and then he looked me in the eye. “You’re not gonna start ducking out on me when you see me from now on, right?”
Was he serious? Really? “You’ve GOT to be kidding me.” I said.
“Hehehe, ok, ok. Just checking. I’m glad you told me. I feel like I know more about you now. You’re even more surprising than I expected.”
“Can’t you just read my mind and get it all in one sum?” I blushed.
“Yeah…but where’s the fun in that? I can wait. I’d much rather have you tell me…in your ownwords. And in your own time. I don’t mind being a patient audience sometimes.” He said. God…he’s still perfect. I may NEVER be able to have him the way I want him, never in my life….but he’s gonna remain the boy of my dreams for as long as I live. Hands down…he’s the best.
I remember how sad I felt to see him going back towards his lot for the night, while I had to find away to get home without too much angst from my parents. But as weirded out as I felt about things that night, I was right back at the club the following weekend. This time, dressed up with more glitter and wristbands than before.
Heh, I remember Jason telling me how good I looked that night, but it was only a few seconds before he asked, “So Mark…what happened? With Gyro, I mean! Did you make him scream your name, or what?”
I looked across the club, and managed to catch sight of Gyro at the bar, sweet talking some young female vampire into paying for his drinks for the evening. He connected his gaze to mine, smiled mischievously…and gave me a wink. Hehehe, what could I do but wink back at him?
“WELL???” Jason asked again.
I told him, “Let’s just say that Gyro and I…shared a night that I’ll never forget.”
“What’s thatsupposed to mean?” He asked.
“Well…I took a chance, and I think it was worth it.”
“Yep. It certainly was.” I said, and then started scanning the rest of the club until I found another few boys that might interested me.
Ahhh, there’s one. A VERY cute boy with light blond hair and a black mesh t-shirt on. Maybe I should go over and talk to him.
Jason saw me eyeing the cutie and raised an eyebrow. “Are you going for it?”
“Yeah…” I smiled. “I think I am.”
Jason was shocked. “Holy shit! Really??? Fuckin’ A! GOfor it, dude!”
I patted Jason on the shoulder, and I said, “Well…sometimes you’ve got to live a little bit to learn how to live a little bit more. Right?” He didn’t seem to get it, but whatever. I’ve got a sweetheart to pursue.
Thanks gyro. You’ll always be my favorite boy. Always.